Everyday Stress Busters for Today's Mom (No, Really!)

Written by Mariana Ashley

It's no secret: we live in a high-paced, high-demand society with harsh economic times, long workdays, constant money woes, and close to impossible family obligations. And it's no secret: more and more people are suffering from the effects of stress and anxiety, which can be a real threat to our health. I'm not trying to be a "Debbie Downer." In fact, I'm here to help. There are ways to reduce your stress. Easy ways. And it'll help you become healthier and happy.

Actually get sleep.
Though we all know that getting an adequate amount of sleep is important, it can never be stressed enough how important sleep really is for our bodies and mind. Whether you are a college student trying to make it through a rough finals schedule or are fully employed and needing to stay up late to finish your big project, it probably just isn't worth losing the sleep. Insufficient sleep on a regular basis can cause depression, diabetes, obesity, and many other serious health issues. Moreover, lack of sleep can do serious damage to your mood and subsequently your stress levels. If you are feeling extremely stressed, take a nap and get some rest. It's likely that you will be more productive and more successful with whatever you are stressed about after you are fully rested and clear minded. 

Eat right. (Seriously.)

Something many of us don't take into account when considering our stress levels throughout the day is our diet. With busy days of work, school, or family obligations, it is easy to let our meals fall to the back burner. Grabbing something quick to eat as take-out or heating up that frozen pizza is no doubt easier than cooking an entire meal on our busy days, but it's important to heat regular, well-rounded meals. The food we eat determines who we feel both physically and mentally. Be sure you are eating regular meals that touch on all of the essential food groups. 

Exercise in any way possible.

Exercising is one of the best ways to combat stress. The benefits of exercise are no secret. Everything talks about how important exercise is. However, even just a walk around the block or a minute of jumping jacks can help to reduce the amount of stress you are feeling. The endorphins released during physical exertion are natural stress reducers in your body. Not only does exercising provide this natural defense against stress, but it also allows people time to meditate and relax. Activities like running, yoga, and swimming laps provide a meditative environment. With continual repetitive motions, people can put themselves in a clear state of mind that allows for ample space to think and relax. This alone time is a wonderful way to de-stress. 

What are you doing to combat stress? What are your most effective stress busters?

About the author: Mariana Ashley is a freelance writer who particularly enjoys writing about online colleges. She loves receiving reader feedback, which can be directed to mariana.ashley031 @gmail.com

15 Years From Now...

Yesterday morning, as Aiden and I made our way from the bus stop to his school, we hopped over the cracks in the NYC sidewalks, trying our best not to step on them. But we did. A lot. And every time we stepped on a crack, we laughed. Loudly. And people looked at us like we were a little crazy. But we didn't pay too much attention to them. We simply said, "Oops! I stepped on another one!" More laughter. More smiling. More stares from onlookers. It was the best time ever!

This morning, we played that game again. It was even more fun than when we played yesterday. 

Then I got to thinking... this right here... is what this parenting thing is all about. Making memories. Happy, smiling, FUN, and lovely memories. 

{"silly rabbit, Trix are for kids"}

15 years from now, I want Aiden to have fond memories of his childhood with me. I don't want him to remember me as a busy bee mom who didn't have time to play with him. In fact, I don't even want him to remember that my career was demanding. Instead I want him to remember me sitting on the floor next to him putting together puzzles, or setting up his train tracks, or playing with his race cars. 

I want him to remember the books that I read to him, the funny facial expressions that I made, and my voice inflections. I want him to recall how I really, really got into the characters to engross him in the story. 

I want him to remember the times I pretended to be Batman or Superman. I want him to remember when I transformed into Flash (another Superhero, for those of you "Superhero Virgins") and ran all over our living room with him. 

I don't want him to remember how tired I was of how often I was tired. Instead, I want him to remember how we played hide and seek in our apartment. 

I want him to remember how I stayed with him at night until he fell asleep because he was afraid of the dark, not that I really, really wanted him to fall asleep so that I could tackle some work and get some writing done. 

I want him to remember that we chased after birds on the way to school. And jumped over the cracks in the NYC sidewalks. Not that I was watching my watch because we were late for school that morning as a result of me pressing the snooze button three times. (Oops!) 

I want him to remember the hugs and kisses and warm and fuzzy feelings. Not that I was constantly thinking of the tasks that I had to accomplish next. Too busy for hugs and kisses? Hmm... That's not the kind of mother that I want to be. 

I want him to remember how many times I put down what I was doing just to give him my full attention and watch him play. Just to teach him something. Just to tell him how proud I am of him (because I am) and how much of a blessing he is to me. And to the universe. 

{that's one fashionable kid}

I want him to know that he was put here for a purpose and I want him to pursue his passion and purpose. Boldly. 

So I'm mothering more consciously. More intentionally. And I'm jumping over the cracks in the sidewalks because that's what makes Aiden happy. Because when he's all grown up, I want him to look back and smile. And smile again. And know that he had the best childhood that I could provide for him.

What about you? What do you want your kids to remember 15 years from now? How are you working to help them achieve those memories. 

Rediscover Yourself In Motherhood

Guest Post by Alia Haley

Mothers play the most vital role in a family. If you're a mother, then you need to be always healthy in order to keep your family healthy because a healthy mother = a healthy family. Here are some tips to help you stay health and rediscover yourself in motherhood:

Consider yourself important too

The first and foremost task for moms is to always keep fit and fine. She would not be able to carry out her duties if she gets weak. You are important too so take time for your own health.

Try to make a flawless schedule

Or as flawless as possible. It is not always possible to schedule your commitments according to your time and requirements if you have a baby, but making a schedule and prioritizing helps with this. Also, try to get into all the works when your baby gets onto bed.

Take breaks in multi-tasking

If you constantly carry out your job without taking a rest, then it may result in your weakness. As well, it creates a bit of stress on you. Taking breaks to just breathe helps with this.

Look after your own mental health

Looking after your mental balance is another imperative part of motherhood. If you do not take care of your mental health, then you would become irritated and it may result in misunderstanding with your children.

As a mother you have to play the role of captain in home. For that reason, you need to be fit and fine physically as well as mentally. Hope, the aforementioned tips may help you a lot to get to rediscover yourself in motherhood.

About the author: Alia Haley is a blogger by profession. She loves writing on technology and luxury. She is also fond of gadgets. Recently an article on Fisher Price Toys for Toddlers attracted her attention. These days she is busy in writing an article on Alternative medicine.

The Green Team, Baby! PLUS, Win $1000 from eBay!

I'm pretty excited to share something with you that I think is, like, so totally awesome. It's my latest obsession and it's name is eBay Green, my new fave spot for eco-friendly education, inspiration, and, of course, shopping (one of my fave pastimes).

In 2012, it's all about reducing, reusing, and recycling, and this new eBay site is going to make the 3 R's as easy as possible for you. While helping you earn money, of course. How so? Well, because the site is dedicated to being entirely green. While helping you earning money, of course.

And it's not only a shopping portal (although, let's face it: shopping is a major bonus!). There's also the Green Team Talks where you can get schooled on all things "green," like composting and the impact of the aluminum can. (And then, get your shopping on, baby!)

PLUS: If you have a question, you can post it in the "Ask the Green Team Community," and other eBay Green community members can help answer.

PLUS: On the eBay Green site, community members can create Eco Shopping Lists on pretty much anything. Household products, baby products, nursery items... take your pick!

Can't think of anything "green" to list? Simple solution! With the exception of old appliances, anything that's already in existence and can be re-used can be considered "green." Think "refurbished, pre-owned (or "pre-loved"), and re-purposed." And there you have it -- GREEN! As a super dope eBay Green Team member puts it, "The greenest product is one that already exists." WORD!

For your chance to win a $1,000 eBay gift card, follow these steps below:

1. Visit the eBay Green website.
2. Sign with your eBay User ID and password.
3. Join the Green Team.
4. On the homepage (green.ebay.com) identify the “Greener Alternative” and “Eco Shopping Lists” sections.
5. Next to these sub headers, you’ll see “add an item” or “create a list.”
6. To enter the contest, select the proper category and click on “add an item” or “create a list.”
7. By adding an item URL from the eBay marketplace and explaining why it’s a greener alternative or creating a list of eco items, you are entered to win.
8. Once the listing appears on the site, you are entered to win a $1,000 eBay gift card!

{Full Disclosure: As an eBay Parent Panel Ambassador, this post and giveaway is being sponsored by eBay. All opinions expressed herein are my own.}

Common Misconceptions of Single Mothers (And Dating)

Since venturing out into the dating world as a single mother, I’ve experienced some highs and lows, ups and downs, some good first dates, some great dates, and er, a story of “love” and loss. Remember them? Sigh.

But now that "I guess I got my swagga back" (Cue Jay-Z and Kanye), I’m reflecting on some of the things that people think about single moms who date. And I don’t like ‘em. I may be independent, but I still have my moments of insecurity and doubt every now and again, especially whenever my love life hits a bump in the road… just like every other single person out there. And the misconceptions don’t help with those insecurities. So… it’s high time that I set the records straight.

We’re not all looking for the next father for our kid(s).
Aiden already has his other parent. And even if he’s not as involved as I would expect a parent to be, he’s still Aiden’s other parent. So if I agree to go on one date, it’s not because I’m looking for Aiden’s next other parent. Negative. Not even close. I agree to go on dates for the same reason any other single person agrees to go on dates – companionship. That’s all. If it works out, like way, way, waaaayyy down the line, then I would hope that dude would be a father figure for Aiden, but not today. Or tomorrow. Or in three months.

We’re protective of our kid(s).
More often than not, the child of a single parent has already been through something major in their lives (like divorce or separation), and in Aiden’s case, a parental break-up. So I’m protective of him, and rightfully so gosh darn it! I once had a guy ask if he could take both Aiden and me out… for a first date. Umm… heck no! I’m sure he was trying to do the “I can totally be a good step-father” thing and whatnot, but I wasn’t having that. There’s no easy way to put this, but to me, it just sounds pedophile-esque. If and when the time is right, I’ll be happy to introduce Aiden to the guy I’m seeing. But not a second sooner.

We’d want to date the guy, not his bank account.
Not all single mothers are gold-diggers, just like not all women are gold-diggers. Baby, I have my own money and my own bank account. And I think I’m doing pretty well so I don’t need Mr. Man to hold it down for me financially. That being said, with the right guy, it’s… nice. It’s nice to have someone to share with and depend upon if/when it’s necessary. Which brings me to my next point…

We appreciate when Mr. Man pays for dates.
Not all of the dates. But some of them. Like I said, it’s… nice. I’m independent and self-sufficient, but damn, I’m not rich. So while I won’t expect Mr. Man to offer to pay for babysitting and all, fronting the bill for dinner and drinks is a little gesture that’ll go a long way. If dude thinks that that’s too expensive, he should just think about how much babysitting costs per hour. And then offer to pay.

We appreciate when Mr. Man plans in advance.
Calling to ask me out the same day will not work most of the time. My babysitters have lives too. Not to mention, it’s just bad forum to call a girl up the same day and ask for a date. So even if I wasn’t a mother, I’d have an issue with it. It would make me feel as though dude’s first choice fell through and he thought I was second best. Homie don’t play that.

We’re busy.
If I say “I’m busy, Aiden has ______,” it’s usually because I’m actually busy and Aiden actually has ______. I’m not “playing hard to get” (not too hard anyway) and I’m not playing games. I’m just busy. However, if I chronically use that line on the same dude, eek! Well, that’s just single mom speak for “not interested.”

Now… everyone share this list with a single, hot, well-mannered, driven, smart, fun, ambitious, and sexy guy that you know and tell him good things about me. Just kidding. (Sorta.)

Supermom and Superwoman: Balancing It All

Time to time, I receive messages and emails from people asking something along the lines of, "How do you balance it all and manage to fit it all in?" While I am absolutely flattered that readers feel comfortable coming to me to ask questions, etc, I must say that I am in no way an expert on balancing life as a single mother. But I try because that's what truly counts in life anyway, right?

One way that I always answer the question is something along the lines of this: I try to prioritize as much as possible. Sometimes that looks different depending on the week. Case in point: this week Aiden has Kindergarten interviews so that has been my main focus.

(By the way, I'm totally having a "Argh... I hate NYC and the entire private school admissions process/Why didn't I move to the suburbs?/ Why can't every kid just go to a good school?" type of week. So be sure to send Aiden your well wishes. But I digress...) Between prepping myself for typical interview questions, trying not to be nervous in front of Aiden, and bribing him with ice cream encouraging him with the little rewards, I've been a busy bee.

But it's always like that. I'm always busy.

My focus just shifts depending on the week. Sometimes I stay up until 3am to write articles, sometimes I'm too tired so I go to bed by midnight. Sometimes I cover media events around NYC. Sometimes I want to be able to tuck Aiden in bed and read him a bedtime story.

Sometimes I need to give our apartment my attention by cleaning and cooking and all that jazz. Sometimes I'd rather contribute to the mess by playing with Aiden on the floor (floor puzzles seem to be his favorite activity at the moment). Sometimes I need a rigorous hour-long kick-ass workout. Sometimes I need a low key 30-minute hey-this-is-better-than-nothing walk.

Sometimes I need to go-go-go to get ish done. Sometimes I need to slow down and meditate. Sometimes I need to go out on the town with my girlfriends because that gives me a different kind of energy. Sometimes I need to stay in because, well, I just don't feel like going out.

But what I always, always, always do is this one thing: prioritize what needs to get done for the next week or two and make a reasonable plan to get it done. ("Reasonable" being the operative word here.) And then I move on to the next thing. And I make a reasonable plan to get that done. And so on and so forth. And slowly, but surely, things get done.

So I guess the "secret" is this: I can balance multiple things because my full focus, energy, and attention are only on one or two of those things at a time.

What about you? How do you balance it all and get things done?

Staying Faithful to Your New Year's Resolution

By Marie Hunter

A new year has begun and with it, resolutions have been declared. Lose weight/start a diet, quit smoking, travel more – whatever you've chosen to change in your life, know that you can be successful. You'll need to be dedicated but you don't have to see your resolve disappear before the spring thaw.

While it's great to be ambitious, don't overshoot the moon. If you want to lose weight or start a new diet, always be sure to be kind to yourself. You're human; if you 'slip' and eat something that's not on your new plan, remember that it's not the end of the world. You can get back on track with your next meal, all while the world continues revolving. Consider using a service like grocery delivery to make sure you have fresh fruits and vegetables on hand. Making things easier on yourself can help you be successful and give you the time to focus on goals related to your resolution, such as getting to the gym for a workout.

It's best to be specific with your resolutions, although it's wise to leave a little wiggle room. For instance, if you have vowed to become a vegetarian this year but you've been a carnivore your whole life, take things slowly. Start with a modest goal, such as two vegetarian meals during the week. Doing so will give your body time to adjust to your new way of eating and won't feel you leaving deprived should you want a hamburger. Similarly, go slowly when it comes to difficult tasks like quitting smoking. Again, you can be successful. If you're smoking a pack a day in January and haven't completely quit by your March 1 deadline, don't stress. Make notice of the progress you've made and continue towards your eventual goal.

Getting away for a weekend trip or vacation is certainly fun, which is likely why people around the world vow to travel more when declaring their resolutions for the New Year. Make plans for your future getaways and make some definite plans. If you enjoy hiking, consider planning a trip that will allow you to explore new terrain. Being a bit concrete about your goals can help you see them to completion, rather than sitting by the proverbial window and dreaming about a someday road trip to some city. If you always drive, consider taking the train. Buy your tickets and schedule time away from work so that you'll actually take the trip instead of pushing plans to the back burner where they will linger and be forgotten until it's time to make resolutions in December.

It's easier said than done, but don't beat yourself up if one of your resolutions doesn't turn out the way you want it to. For instance, a goal of learning a new musical instrument is noble, but don't feel you've failed if you're not ready to perform a solo with the local orchestra by the time summer arrives. Always keep in mind the progress you've made, that you made a big change in the first place, and what you've gained and learned since declaring your resolution. You'll probably surprise yourself at just how much you've changed without realizing it.

About the Author: Maire enjoys baking Snickerdoodles, crafting with her niece and nephews, going on hikes with friends, and blogging on behalf of Sears and other brands she trusts.