Tuesday, January 21, 2014

Who Do You Have In Your Inner Circle?

I was on Facebook the other day and came across a post from my good blogging buddy, Tara. She was talking about a chat she was about to have with another mother/blogger/writer about business plans, goals, career moves and the like. And I could feel her excitement jumping off the page.

After the call, which she referred to as, "energizing," she posted another status about being ready to work all night. (Okay, this is maybe kinda sorta bordering along the lines of "stalker-ish." But it doesn't count if she's my friend, right?)

Then I got to thinking. *Cue Carrie Bradshaw.*

It's just so important for us to have folks in our inner circle who will motivate us to be greater, push us to go further, and encourage us to just… keep... going… even when we don't feel like it. I mean, we can't achieve our goals unless we position ourselves for success and that means surrounding ourselves with the doers and the shakers and the movers of this world.

For me, that circle is a combination of my professional colleagues whom I learn from all day long, mentors who I may not see often, but stay in contact via email and they're always dropping knowledge on a sista, friends from college and grad school that I have dinner/drinks/get-togethers with and talk about everything from our career goals to dating to motherhood (For me. I do most of the talking about motherhood). And The Guy, who I'm learning to let inspire me in ways that I never thought possible.

"Go farther, go further, go harder. Is that not why we came? And if not, then why bother?" That's a Jay-Z line that I've always loved. Not only because he's talking to all of the folks listening to the record, but he's also talking to the other young artists recording the song with him. He's telling them to set goals and follow through on them, to keep pushing, to keep going, and not to stop until they've achieved success. It's a word of encouragement if there ever was one.

Get at least five people in your inner circle who will motivate you to do just that -- work at it until you reach your goal.

If you don't have any people like that, find them. Think of the person who has the career that you want or the person who you see making moves, ask them to go out for a cup of coffee. Talk with them about their career and the moves that they've made in order to get to where they are now. Can't go out for coffee? Send an email. (I get tons of emails asking me questions about my day job or my writing. And I take the time to answer all of them.) Too shy to send an email? Add them as a friend online. (Heck, that's what social media is there for, right? Sharing and networking!)

Bottom line: you need some people in your inner circle who are the movers and the shakers and to doers of this world. You need folks who will motivate and inspire you. You can't do all the motivating and inspiring because things will get rough, you will feel overwhelmed, you will feel like crying because behind the success are lots of tears and fears and stress that no one seems to talk about.

Trust me on this: you will feel like giving up and you will need someone to be there for you. To listen to you. To encourage you. And to be a breath of fresh air for you.

So much so that when you finish interacting with them, you feel ready to bring it. And do the damn thing!

Who do you have in your inner circle like this?


  1. I agree completely. We need people to push us and keep us moving forward. That should be a must have on the friend list : must motivate, encourage and inspire.

  2. this is a great post because it's so true that we need to have people in our lives that will encourage and motivate us...you and Tara encouraged me to get it together and begin a group of all the women that motivate me to do something great in 2014!!!


I love reading what you have to say!


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...