Wednesday, May 18, 2011

How To Know You're A Kick-Ass Mom

I have a few insecurities about being a single parent. I’ll be the first to admit that. One of my biggest insecurities is that my three-year-old son, Aiden will turn out all kinds of screwed up because his other parent doesn’t live with him. I’ve read enough articles and books to know that living in a single parent household is a risk factor for kids’ emotional, social, and cognitive development.

Sometimes my insecurities get the best of me, especially on days when Aiden’s thunderous three’s behavior gets the best of him. On those days, I can’t help but wonder how much of his behavior is developmentally appropriate, and how much of it is because he lives in a single parent household.

This may not be logical to some, but it is how I think. Sometimes. In fact, I had one of those thoughts just a few days ago when Aiden was not having a good day, and I was not dealing with it too well.

But this time, instead of self-loathing for too long (yes, it gets that bad at times), I sat back and thought of a few things my baby does to show that he’s growing well. You know what? He’s actually learning a thing… or twenty.


  1. I think you are a wonderful mom! You cover all the bases! Not saying coming from a two parent home doesn't have its' advantages, but remember two parent homes also have disadvantages. Oh, yeah!

    My husband came from a two parent home. And trust me when I write, the children from that union might have been better off if the parents had separated. LOL's. For they are all emotionally messed up! All! Several of my cousins came from two parent homes, and I and my siblings came from a one parent home, and I would say my mother's children are doing better than many of their cousins. So, I just think it depends on the individual, and if they can hang with the demands of running a one parent household. Meaning it is all in the mind. All in the mind!

    But, again, I so admire you! You are doing more than just making it! You are living a successful life, and when a man worthy of your hand comes along he will just be an added blessing to an already blessed life.

  2. You are a great mom! Heading over to read the rest of the post!

  3. Babies learn at their own pace. To them if you understand what they are saying it is a big success. When they learn to say "no", "yeah" or even "tanku", they appreciate if you understand and respond.
    Take it from a grandma, babies know when they are loved
    Don't freak out. Statistically a two parent home is ideal, but every child and every pair of parent is different. Who is to say a single parent loving home is not better than a two parent family, where there is one abusive totally bad parent and one is loving. Just, don't hesitate to ask for help. Holler when ever you feel stressed out. Also look out for your own signs of running down out of energy. Ask family, friends, coworkers, neighbours any one, there is nothing to be ashamed of in asking for help. Once your kid is grown you and your kid can pay it forward. Enjoy your child. There is nothing equal to these precious times.

  4. Heading over now. I always love your contributions to The Young Mommy Life.

  5. Heading over to read and comment now. However, I will say that Aiden is totally fine. His being raised in a single parent household is not hurting at all in a developmental way. So, don't start blaming or second guessing yourself. You are fab!! And Aiden is wonderful!!


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