Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Stolen Moments At Midnight With My Love

Well not exactly midnight. But 11:30pm. Exactly three hours after Aiden's bedtime on the evenings when I don't have class. When I do have class, it's a little later, but we've learned to make due.

Sometimes Aiden goes through these phases where he wakes up a few hours after his bedtime, comes in to the living room, usually where I'm doing school work, and asks for something to drink.

Because I'm the Queen Bee of consistency and I want him to get used to staying in his bed all night (even during these phases), I usually walk him back to the bedroom, re-tuck him in, give him a kiss, and head back to the living room.

But now that I'm a few weeks into my last semester of grad school, the work is really beginning to pile on. And between single motherhood, school, and everything else, my days are getting longer and longer, and my nights shorter. And shorter. Sigh.

And sometimes I feel like Aiden gets the short-end of the stick.

Although this is totally developmentally-appropriate, these days his favorite catchphrase is, "Mommy, look at me!" And I can't help but feel as though he says this so often because, well, I'm not looking at him as often as I could. Observing his new skill. Applauding his efforts. Cheering him on. Celebrating his success. Soaking up his awesomeness. 

My mind is pre-occupied with the next thing on my to-do list. Sigh.

But something shifted one night when he awoke mere moments before midnight. And I "got it." He just wants to spend time with me. Quality time. Time that we can never get back.

So on that night, I didn't rush him back to his bed. But I hugged him tight. Right there on our living room couch. I gave him a cup of milk. His absolute favorite drink. I kissed him. And received several sweet kisses in return. He picked a book from his library, and I read it to him.

Then... he fell asleep in my arms. And it was even better than I remembered it being when he would fall asleep in my arms as an infant.

I guess I needed that -- that moment with him at midnight. He needed it. We needed it.

It reminded me of this one thing: no matter how many other things I have going on in my life, no matter how busy I get, Aiden is the best freakin' part of my day.

Because at the end of the day, it's our kids who need us the most. No one said it would be easy, but it's certainly worth it. Don't you think?

Smooches,

28 comments:

  1. I love this post. I'm a busy single mother too, and sometimes I really have to check myself to make sure my son doesn't get the short end of the stick.

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  2. This is a lovely post!! You are working so hard and I have so much admiration for what you are doing...he will look back at this time and realize that you did everything for him. But you are so right - we need to capture these little moments as they arise. We won't ever get this time back!! Beautiful,
    xx

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  3. This is super sweet! Nothing wrong with taking time to enjoy those special moments every now and then.

    http://ourrfamilyjourney.blogspot.com/

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  4. Oh, this is so sweet. And, yes, it is totally worth it. My older daughter is needing me a bit more these days (she is sensing the impending arrival of her littlest sis) and I have just realized that I need to adapt my life to give her the attention she needs now. You are 100% right about the fact that this is time we will never get back. Thank you for the sage reminder!

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  5. I couldn't agree with you more.

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  6. I love this post! It's such a great description of a wonderful mother/son moment. I admire you so much my friend, Aiden is so luck to have a mom that is not only smart and brilliant but also completely dedicated to him and making his life better! You rock girl! xoxo :)

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  7. Awww...well, I guess that is what Moo's 3 AM wake-up calls are all about. As much as I'd love for her to sleep thru the night, I have kind of enjoyed her tapping me on my shoulder or waking me up with a kiss on my cheek before the sun is even up. It reminds me that no matter what she loves me and just wants to spend time with me.

    I'm going to cherish these moments because they grow so fast and soon she'll prefer spending time with her friends, cell phone and Facebook.

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  8. @YUMMommy: on Facebook. haha! They may come up with something more clever by then. Can't imagine what though.

    @Jessica: It's a constant battle, my friend. But we make it work. We have to.

    @Patty: YOU rock! Like, really... you do.

    @Aidan: Oh she senses it alright. So great of you to give her even more. And right at the time that she needs it most.

    @Sarah: I only try to give a little of the inspiration that I get from you guys, my readers.

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  9. Oh, I love this post, Alicia! The best part is that we never know what moments will stand out in our children's minds as they become adults. You may have very well just created a memory that Aiden will conjure up to comfort and encourage himself during his college years, during his professional life, or even when he has children of his own. Kudos to you for being such an Execumama--handling the business, no doubt, but never forgetting the equal importance of our babies!

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  10. I'm so like you in that sense - always the stickler for routine/consistency. But I love that you can also be flexible and embrace those "special moments" as they come. We can never get those times back!

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  11. Absolutely! They will only be little for so long and then these night will no longer be. Treasure those moments when you can! Everything else will still be there...

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  12. What an awesome post. These moments are so precious and we can never go back in time and create them.

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  13. What a wonderful reminder to take the time to notice the joy right in front of you!

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  14. Absolutely LOVE this post. I'm all about routines and keeping things as they were no matter how they are but those times are sooooo necessary. I've learned to lay my books down sometime, wake up a little early before going to work at night, and just hug my Chunks. And just like I said I would, I stole your line and use it every morning when I get home.

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  15. No, motherhood isn't always easy but I know those stolen moments with Aiden's sweet kisses totally makes it all worth it!

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  16. This really hit home for me. My daughter is 10 months old, and what hurts the most is when my mom (her full time babysitter) calls me at work to tell me what new developmental milestone my daughter hit that day. Great post, thank you for putting it all in perspective!

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  17. The best part of our days are ones we spend with our kids - Oh, I love this post!

    Blessing
    www.workingmomjournal.com

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  18. Alicia, this post is so super sweet. YOU are so super sweet! Glad you're finding the time to enjoy those "little" moments. I can only imagine how hard you're working to juggle it all. xo

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  19. That was absolutely beautiful. I had a moment like that with my little one and it does remind you of those important bonding moments you and your then infant had together. It's a wonderful feeling and I'm glad that you were able to experience that with your baby.

    KMN

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  20. YOU ARE AMAZING!! YES All CAPS.

    Just a beautiful post. You are doing all the right things and I always love having those moments with my daughter. Their little faces just make you want to hold on forever.

    http://www.nycsinglemom.com

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  21. Lovely! The time does go fast and you'll be glad you had that wonderful time together, especially when tween/teen years are in full swing. :-)

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  22. This post is amazing <3

    Nolan is the best part of my day too <3

    ~Jess

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  23. This post made me tear up. It is so easy to get caught up in our busy lives that we put the ones that matter the most aside. I am sure that your moment on the couch together meant the world to him. It is the moments that we least expect that can have the most meaningful impact on our kids. Thank you for sharing this story. It's precious.

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  24. Thanks for bringing what's important to the fore-front. I am extremely busy too. I am a mom, mommy blogger, business owner, wife and student. My family is the most important thing in the world.

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  25. Wow. What a very, very precious post. This should be sent out to every mama of a little person. You're so inspiring and insightful!

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  26. Cherish, cherish, CHERISH every moment like this. They are so precious. My son is now a tween and although he's grown very independent he still sleeps on my floor next to the bed on Friday nights, or asks me to watch a movie with him for family time and oh the hugs that he gives a gazillion times a day are priceless. These moments are what give me the strength to just keep swimming. Seeing my son thriving with the love surrounding him says to me I'm doing a good job being his mom!

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  27. @Kerissa: I'm in tears now. And you are so right. It does make you feel like you are doing a great job! Kudos!

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