Be Yourself; Everyone Else Is Already Taken

[photo via]

I've written about this quote before. It speaks volumes to me. Everyday, I learn more and more about myself and everyday I learn to show the world more of who I am and less of who I think people want me to be.

It's not always easy.

But it is always necessary.

Last week, I turned down a pretty good (and well paid!) social media campaign because I knew that it wasn't a good fit for this place and space. I knew that there was no way I could put a personal spin on the topic at hand and present it to my beloved readers -- you. I knew that I wouldn't have gotten anything from it (except, maybe a few pairs of shoes and outfits from the payout... I kid, I kid). But, most importantly, I knew that it wouldn't serve this audience in the way that I've set forth to serve this audience.

So I said, "No."

And it felt good.

I've chosen to be myself in this place and space. My single mom, delicious self who works hard, plays hard, and is almost getting it [kind of] together. I share my trials and triumphs because it speaks to people and it helps someone along their own journey. I try to be candid, even if that means being vulnerable and "putting it all out there."

It's not always easy, but at the end of the day, it feels... right.

So today -- and everyday! -- I want to encourage you to be yourself. Share your journey and share your story with others. (Trust me on this: someone somewhere is waiting to hear it.)

You're fabulous. Not to mention, everyone else is already taken.

I Won't Let Him Down

Aiden has been spending more and more time with older men. It’s been a blessing to both of us, but mainly to him.

He wants it. 

He needs it. 

That rough-and-tumble-this-is-testosterone-territory, I-love-my-mother-but-this-other-person-TOTALLY-gets-me moment seems to be what he lives for these days. 

I'm beginning to notice it more and more. And I've been doing something about it -- seeing to it that he spends more meaningful and productive time with other males.

But something happened a few weeks ago that made my heart sink. 

My friend A, Aiden, and I were playing with his toys on the living floor of my apartment, and, in the midst of laughter and smiles, Aiden called him, “daddy.” 

I didn’t make a big deal out of it, and I’m not even sure if A noticed the Freudian slip, but in that very moment, I felt sorry... 

Sorry that I didn’t pick a better parenting partner to help raise Aiden; sorry that Aiden doesn’t get to call someone “daddy” every day; sorry that Aiden doesn’t have the security in a father that he deserves. Just… sorry. 

That night, as I read Aiden a bedtime story, tucked him in, gave him sweet hugs and kisses again and again and again, and rubbed his back until he fell asleep, I vowed to have him spend as much time with other lovely male mentors as he needs. 

He wants it. So badly.

And more importantly, he needs it. So badly.

It's so very crucial to his development. 

And so.

It's up to me to see to it that it happens. I can't let him down.

I won't let him down.

{Personal Style} The Work Pants

[pants: Joe Fresh; blouse, shirt: F21; shoes, ring: Aldo; lip: Rimmel London]

There's something about skinny jeans that I love. They make my legs look long and slender, and they pretty much go with everything.

Except... I can't wear 'em to work.

So I've been on the hunt for a pair of pants that I can wear to work, but that also has a "slim and skinny" fit. (I totally just made that term up.) I was at a loss until I stumbled upon these bad boys from Joe Fresh (one of my new fave stores, by the way). And, now I'm in love.

They're trendy and fashionable, and totally work-appropriate. Score!

I paired it with a pale pink blouse with a necktie, a vest, and patent pumps for a sophisticated flare.

And, of course, there's my top knot that's been my super easy, no-fuss, go-to hair style these days. Although... the FLOTUS totally has me crushing on her bangs and I'm seriously contemplating a hair-style change.

Hope you all have a very stylish week!

What Moms Want From President Obama

[photo via]

I'm not here to tell you want moms want. I'm here to ask you. I'm writing a piece for an online publication and we want to know what you want to see from Obama in his second term. So whether you voted for him or not, and no matter where you stand politically, I would love to here your opinions on the following:

• healthcare
• education
• gun control laws
• environmental issues
• anything else you deem important

Your name and age (if you feel comfortable sharing it) will be included with your quote. You can either leave your quote in the comments section or email it to me directly at momdelicious@gmail.com.

Let's have America hear our voices.

Ready... set... GO! 

On Confronting and Releasing Your Fears

[photo via]

Most of the time, I like to think that I'm a put-together grown-up. I've written about this before. But being a grown-up is hard sometimes. Sometimes, I have to deal with things that I don't want to deal with (at the moment), but I have to deal with because dealing with it is what makes me a mature grown-up.

Sometimes I'm successful at this sooner than later.

But sometimes... I'm a straight up punk. I stall. I avoid. And I convince myself that I need to stall and avoid because it's a defense mechanism, some sort of a survival tactic.

I'm not even kidding.

But this year, in order to experience progress, I'm resolving to do more things that scare me. Starting now.

This week, there are three things that I plan to confront, deal with, and then release.
1. Talk to my school's Principal about an uncomfortable subject that's been on my mind for the past week-and-a-half.
When it comes down to it, the topic is not even a big deal. But I've been maybe kinda sorta avoiding the inevitable conversation because having the conversation will make me uncomfortable. But... I just have to do it and be done with it.

2. Read an email from Aiden's School Psychologist.
The email is a follow-up conversation that she and I had three weeks ago (prior to him going on Winter Break). To my defense: she just sent the email to me two days ago and I've been really, really, really busy since then. (*Wink*) But I will open it. Today. And read her thoughts. Today. And respond to it. Today. And deal with whatever needs to be dealt with. Today.

3. Actually open a bill that I received a few days ago.
It's been looking so sad just sitting there on my kitchen counter. Unopened. (Am I the only one who does this?! Don't answer that.) The funny thing is, I know how much the statement is. And I know exactly when I'm going to pay the darn thing. But I still haven't opened it because I don't want to face it and actually see the number and do the mental math and face the fact that X amount of dollars will be used on a bill instead of on something more important, like, say, shoes. Just kidding. (And yes, I'm a punk.)

But this week, I will put my big-girl pants on, suck it up, and deal with it. Because I know that it's going to be okay. And I'll see that I was being a total punk for no apparent reason at all.

The only way to get through hard things is to go (and grow) through it. After all, they don't call it "growing pains" for nothing!

{Dating Tales} Date Smarter in 2013

It’s fourteen days into the new year and I’ve decided that one of the things I’m going to do in 2013 is this: date smarter.

Let’s face it: dating smarter helps protect you from messy breakups and heartaches that’ll make you want to do nothing but lie in bed on a Saturday morning even though your son is saying over and over again, “Let’s discuss our plan for today, Mommy! What are we going to do?” But it’ll be tragic if you answered by saying that the only thing you’d like to do is lay there. All day long. And possibly eat ice cream. All day long.

(Totally not talking about myself here.)

In order to avoid this catastrophe and date smarter, I’ve come up with a list of things to do as a single mom who dates:

1. Date different types of guys.
I love that dating shenanigans have a way of being pleasantly surprising. And, more often than not, when I accept an offer from a guy I thought I wouldn’t be into because he wasn’t “my type,” I end up having a really good time and enjoying a new experience. It’s a total win-win.

Head on over to The Date Report to read the rest of the article. As always, feel free to "like" or share it all over the Internet. Just sayin'...

Almost Getting It [Kind of] Together

I’d like to think that I’m pretty put together.

I have a very demanding job and go to work and give it my best. I make conscious decisions about parenting and try my best to think things through whenever it pertains to Aiden. I write almost daily so that I can update this space and meet other freelance deadlines that I have. I workout. Most of the time. I make healthy eating choices and drink lots of water. Most of the time. I take time for myself when I can and I also make time for friendships. Most of the time. Oh, and I go to church to work on my relationship with God.

From the outside looking in, I’ve got it together. Most of the time.

But I’m not Super Woman.

In fact, I’m nowhere near being Super Woman. And sometimes I’m holding things together by a thread. A very thin thread. Sometimes I forget things. Sometimes I take longer than I expected to adjust to new things. Sometimes I want to kick and scream and throw a tantrum because I’m stressed out. Sometimes… life kicks my ass.

But when I wear my burdens lightly and gracefully, I come off as “strong" and "capable" and "Super Woman." The trouble with that is, people think that I’ve got it all figured out and that I'm always put together.

I don’t have it all figured out. I don't pretend to, either. I'm not always put together. I don't pretend to be, either. I'm pretty transparent about that on this place and space. Sometimes… life kicks my ass.

But I’m working on it. I’m working hard at it. And I’m putting it together. And I’m trying to keep it together. 

I hardly ever watch the show Girls, but I saw the tagline on a bus last night and it spoke to me – “Almost getting it kind of together.”

Yeah, that pretty much sums it up.