Friday, July 12, 2013

Let It Go

I had dinner with a friend the other day who is kinda sorta still dealing with the residue of a recent breakup.

(Break-ups are tough, y'all.)

Throughout the course of our conversation, she kept asking me a seemingly simple question: how? How was I able to get over my breakup and relationship with Aiden's other parent? How was I able to learn the necessary lessons and move forward with my life? How was I able to pick up the pieces and keep going? How am I able to maintain a positive outlook on love and life (most of the time) and not let my past dictate my present or define my future?


Let me start off by saying that I am in no way an expert on breaking up and moving forward. But I consider myself somewhat of an expert on this thing called resilience. (Read here or here to find out why.)

So I attempted to answer her question. And I gave her a seemingly simple answer: let it go.

There comes a time in our lives when we need to let things go. We need to let go of past hurt and past pain and past guilt and past circumstances. There comes a point in our lives when carrying toxic relationships become too burdensome and too heavy.

Was I mad and sad and downright pissed off when sweet turned sour in my relationship with Aiden's other parent?

Heck yeah!

Was I confused and ashamed and all kinds of guilty when he became physically abusive?

You bet!

Was I angry that it ended (but also relieved and happy, but still a little sad)?


But the burden of carrying all of that was just... too... much! And once I gained the awareness that I was carrying too much unnecessary weight around, I decided to let it go.

(Easier said than done. I know.)

Little by little, I learned how to take my life back. And it felt good. And it feels good.

If you're holding on to something that is stopping you from being your best self, let it go. It ain't worth it. There's a future waiting for you that's a lot brighter and more fulfilling than that past you're holding on to.

Let it go. And go get your bright future. Things will be better over there.

I promise.


  1. Excellent advice! I needed to hear this today. :)

  2. This is true to heart. Let it go. I'm also in a break up funk but I have learned to let it go. Some days things remind me of him, the good, the bad, and sometimes the ugly. But I've been managing to let it go. Your friend just needs to realize that this too shall pass, in time.

  3. letting go is such a powerful aspect of moving on. i know i've been there done that and succeed!

  4. So true, sometimes releasing that weight will lighten you up and allow you to move forward...

  5. loved your writing style. your blog is amazing. Have been going through some of your posts, will def. recommend to others. Independence Day Speech for Students in Hindi


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