Friday, May 28, 2010

What Kind of Mother Are You?

Fabulous Ladies of SATC 2

Hey Lovelies!

After watching Sex and the City 2 (loved it!) and writing my last blog, I got to thinking about what Miranda was talking about when she told Charlotte "motherhood kicks your a$$." I totally agree with her that motherhood can be very, very tough at times. In fact, with the exception of the fabulous fashion and friendship, that scene was one of my fave parts of the movie! I mean, there was so much truth and substance to that scene... and it was funny too! I can summarize it in two words: very powerful!

But that's a total tangent. Back to the point. After thinking about that scene some more, I got to thinking and began to wonder (a la Carrie Bradshaw): what does it mean to be a "good" mother? Does being a "good" mother mean being perfect all the time? I mean, even "good" mothers have not-so-good moments. And it's not like you give birth and suddenly learn how to be a "good" mother; it's not like babies come with manuals that tell you exactly what to do, when to do it, and how often it needs to be done.

So I asked myself the question: what kind of mother are you? And I realized that on different days I answer that question differently. I have my great days, okay days, and days when I think why the heck did the powers-that-be ever decide to make ME a mother?! Seriously. Let me tell you lovelies a little story. It was the end of my spring semester during this past year in graduate school and I thought I was going to go crazy! I can summarize those few weeks of non-stop paper writing and finals prepping in two words: tough stuff! The demands of schoolwork (I was taking FIVE classes!) and motherhood was really getting to me and there were days when I was just too darn tired to enjoy my duties. Like, I would have much rather slept in on a Saturday morning than take lovely Aiden to his Gymboree class. I'm just saying... During those horrific weeks, I'd gotten so tired that literally eveytime lovely Aiden would ask for something (read a book, play a puzzle, apple juice, almost anything else...), I would respond by saying, "hang on. okay, buddy?" Hey, I needed a minute or two to prepare my mind for prying my butt off of the couch. I don't know if it was the look of desperation on my face or what, but lovely Aiden would take pity on me and wait as patiently as a 2-year-old could. And I justified it by convincing myself that my response helped him work on his delayed gratification skills. Whatever makes me feel better, right? But I realized that I used that response a lil too much when one day, lovely Aiden asked for something and before I could even respond, he asked, "mommy, I have to hang on?" Ouch! Two words can describe how I felt after him asking that: totally awful! So I stopped responding to his requests with "hang on" so often, and I started responding to him more quickly because I wanted him to know that he can depend on me -- that I am a reliable mother.

So what kind of mother am I? Well, the response still varies on the day, time of day, situation, or circumstance. I'm nurturing, caring, compassionate, empathetic, and loving; but I am also a disciplinarian at times, frustrated at times, upset at times, and oh-so-tired at times. And sometimes... I'm just plain fun.

I challenge you to look inside of yourself and get in touch with your inner Carrie Bradshaw and begin to wonder, "what kind of mother are YOU?"




  1. I haven't seen this movie yet - but it is high on my priority list. I can TOTALLY relate to this. I just finished my PhD and by the end of writing it, our little girl (also 2) was saying 'mummy's busy' and whenever she saw me reaching for my laptop, she'd say 'no mummy, leave it!' and look really sad. They pick up on so much and it was heart-breaking. The good thing is when we start to recognise that they understand and more importantly that they don't like it. You sound like you're doing a fantastic job, as we all strive to without a manual! GO YOU! Will def. start following this blog! @: )

  2. @Mrs. O: Thanks for the follow! I saw your blog and it is amazing! Great work! But yea... isn't it just heart-breaking? Especially when they don't understand that you have a 20 page paper due in a few days and you need to get it done!

    And a! You're my inspiration!


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